More Than Meets the I

In studying gender roles and sexuality it is easy to fall into the trap of stereotyping--"all of this category are like this, and all of that category are like that." Transamerica reminds us that people are people; each of us have our own unique quirks, idiosyncrasies, and baggage--sometimes not the least of which is our gender identity. This film is not about trans gendered or pre-op individuals, it is about Bree and Toby. Bree is seeking her identity as a woman through surgical means, when in the end it is finding her role as a parent/mother that brings her the true femininity she seeks. And Toby is searching for unconditional love and learns that it doesn't always come attached to sex.
The film also quietly makes the distinction between gender and sexuality. Bree was notably asexual most of the film: her issue truly was with her gender not from a sexuality standpoint, but from a gender identity standpoint. Once she became more comfortable in her role as a mother and did some growing up herself, she became more attractive and comfortable in her new gender's sexual role.
Toby, on the other hand, is very sexual--taking it whenever and wherever he can get it. A product of a sexually abusive childhood, he associates sex with love. By the end of the film, Toby can't get it up during a male/male sex scene. Next scene is Toby at Bree's door--searching. Perhaps his journey of sexual identity is beginning. I could imaging he and Bree drinking those beers and talking about finding oneself. Toby is very comfortable in his gender role, but has sexuality issues. Bree now has her gender issues resolved, which takes care of her sexuality issues as well. But most of all, Bree and Toby are believable characters; they found each other, and in doing that they both grew up and found themselves.